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Not Who - But Why?

The thought for this chapter came from a training on EQ (Emotional Quotient). It talked on how we need to be aware of our perceptions. It further talked about concept to “seek to understand” thus reinforcing not who but why.

Let me cite an example. I work with someone who is a nay sayer. She would find all reasons on why something wouldn’t work or complicate a simple process with bombardment of questions. This was my initial perception. As I got to know her better, I realized that she is very detailed and likes thinking through all the scenarios. As she is detailed she expects the team to think through all potential roadblocks. The “why” is her need for clarity on details vs the “who” is being who she is!

Sometimes my ‘judgmental’ personality comes into play and I have to try harder to ask the questions and understand the context. I also enjoy the ‘speed’ of doing things and roadblocks like this ensure I learn the art of patience.

The reminder is ‘not who but why”. What is the context? Why are they asking the question? What is bothering them? What are they scared off? What is their intent? Let’s us seek to understand a different point of view.

Not who but why

Ask the question

Let go the perception

And seek to understand

Not who but why

Explain the context

Open up and

Give the why

Not who but why

Align on the higher purpose

And start there

It’s the why

That holds the keys

To open the door


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